December 22, 2013 ~ Life Isn't Good Enough; It is Good

Today was lovely.

I felt like I needed to live better. A lot of the reason is for all of you. I was aware of the several ways I could choose to feel as tho my day & life were ruined today. I don't deserve your attention if I don't at least try to have a good day (one worth sharing ) by doing the only thing I have ever done ( all I know how ) :go with the flow, trusting myself to be carried gently to the highest level of happiest I can possibly manage given my mostly unpleasant circumstance of living.

We got much snow & even without glasses it's beautiful to look at. I played Animal Crossing & saw a football fish for the first time. I watched a good movie ( Crystal Fairy ) despite how much I loathe the being of Cera. That first choice to enjoy my lot in life seemed to have a domino effect. I decided to have scrambled eggs, toast, and hot cocoa for breakfast ( i made the toast & cocoa), corn dogs for lunch, and taco bell for dinner. I watched a lot of Xmas cartoons plus watched 2 new un -sane adorbz epees of Friendship is Magic on the flatscreen. I laughed & played & I felt loved.

I took care not to over-do my activity tho I really did wish ever so much I could go out, in the fresh snow, to the grocery store. And I wanted to dance around and be silly. I got all the shopping I'm doing for the holidays done & postage confirmed. None of the peoples I have gifts for are tryin to get em by a certain date & that's so nice to truly not worry. There's not even a tree to put gifts under. December with little to no Christmas is much less stresfull than any and all of the ones that came before it.

I FINALLY figured out how to qualify to be a contestant in the brow game; my right brow is nearly half an inch higher than my left from when my muscles froze on one side of my face for almost a year & I plucked accordingly to hide my damage. Not sure why the bloody hell it took soo long for me to see this. I guess I just am so critical when scrutinizing my face I never stopped to think that there was hope for improvement. I did no crafting & thus was able to pluck my brows til I was done, which n-e-e-e-e-ver-r-r-r-r happens. I didn't stop cuz steady hands expired, but cuz I was finished. The elation I experience from this fact is astoundingly great.  I do look a right fright now, but I'm starting off the new year with a good chance of being beautiful and symmetrical again after many years of being very much not.

Sleep deprived so thriving more than yoosh, ya know.
I still got fatigued.
It still hurt to just sit up.
My knees ache.
My hands ache from using them so much.
My posture was bad all day, so I'll have headaches later.
I was paranoid and itchy
I got burned out a few times BUT CAME BACK enuff to function.
I tot-uh-lay cheated on my diet!
My hair is oddly very dirty just one full day after washing.
( but it looks pre spiff, yo )
And it still hurt ( A LOT ) that the warmth I once shared with the one I Iove is inexplicably absent.

I had to be hard, very still and ice hearted for awhile and when I embraced all that unpleasantness it got over with & the clouds seemed to bust up and reveal the sun to day.

(he was nice to me & not grudgee helpful or cross at all & we had fun like we used to just like *he* wants for our relationship & it's just a part of why my day was good & i almost feel like it wont' end with me bawling to sleep. i feel like it reveals weakness & discredits everything else I've written to share that. but the truth is I allowed for times to be good even tho life is not what I had or what I most desire...and these times became good...with little mind paid to "good enough" )

When i was low i wanted to, but I didn't start a fight to incite passion.
I didn't let *my* grief ruin my day or his.

Now, the day is done. I may cry. I am going to watch My Little Pony and really *see* it now that I watch from the convenience of my lap; it's like I get to watch for the first time all over again {Fluttershy yay}

I thank you all for being part of my life. Even if you're just a stranger for now, know I do love you & appreciate whatever of your truth you shared & I found that helped me get through my hard times, put a smile on my face, or just helped me *feel* I'm not alone.

[used to be when I wrote a complete share & was with it enuff to do so I'd check the Mayan date & slap it in the title or even pull a great rwrap-up out of my ass, so I'll just check now of out habit & let ya know: whoah, that's hellafied fokkin heavy yo. Dec 22, 2013 = 6 Transformer. 6 is flow & my very number which mayan belief means that's like legit why you are alive & shit & transformer is life, death, and rebirth & is srlsy one of the reasons the mayan ways ring true for me cuz i don't think death is death at all, but the transition from this life to another life..i just don't think I have any lives left, yo, cuz I burn bridges lyk a pyro]

GF *&* Vegan Cajun Stuffed Shrooms

Recipe

INGREDIENTS
24 large baby portabella mushrooms
1/4 cup chopped bell peppers
1/2 tsp garlic powder
3/4 tsp cajun seasoning
1/2 tsp cumin
1 cup vegan mayo
3/4 cup mozzarella daiya

PREPERATION
1. preheat oven to 350
2. line 8x11 baking dish with non-stick foil
3. In a large skillet brown peppers & mushroom stems over medium heat. Stir in garlic powder, cajun seasoning, and cumin.
4. pile stuffing into caps and place in baking dish
5. in a small bowl stir together mayo & cheese
6. spoon mixture onto each cap
7. bake for 35 minutes
8. remove from oven & place caps on cooling rack

~*eat & enjoy*~

~*Tue New Thriftday*~

dat Pink Mesh Shirt tho~ I've been looking for a mesh shirt for years & every time I find one in a thrift store it's badly torn up. I couldn't believe my eyes when I found this pink one. In RL it's a most lish poppin pink. I think I'm gonna have fun pullin thread thru the holes to create shapes n words n junk.

I recently made a "Loser Rank" pink heart applique and I think this lush lav sweater shirt I found will be purf fur it.
 
~*6 beanies*~
I so heart pokemon. While people are playing the newest one I'm buying the original starters ;p I totes set my intention to get beanies this season & here it is November *&*I'm already set. I will be brave enuff to cut holes for my twin tails into one of these beanie hats.
 

~* eye. can never hav too many shelves & this one is unsane*~
[LP asked why I say that, so I thot it out. unbelievable+insane] I mush words together & make my own language; don't hate
~it'll be yumtastic when it's pink

~*my 2nd JSN piece*~

~*i have hardcore feels for Badtz Maru*~
Is he a bat penguin hybrid? I dunno, but he's bad ass. This clutch is hella nice; real leather and canvas with the strap attached to the zipper pull. Poor Badtz was put into many a brown color scheme, making this an even more fab find. He's even got his posse on this pastel print!
 I die.

~*This last thing is actually the very *first* item I discovered. Just days before I'd been wanting this particular candy fragrance by this brand, so when I spotted that familiar shape in the distance I was like, "no way!" and then I got closer & could see by the back that it was totes Juice Bar! I was so excited as I picked it up and turned it around...Oh, My, GUMMY BEARs*!!!!* It's even a completely full tester*!*~
Goes great with my candy baby, cotton candy, and frosted cupcake mists.

This is my first thrift outing since my roommate's work schedule changed.
~*!*it's offishull*!*~
Tuesday is my new Thriftday
If these finds are setting the new standard (and I think it is) then this switch from Thurs to Tue is a welcome change~i don't yoosh like change, but am happz bout this *new*

🍁💞🍒💞 Grocerygayz Getting 🍁💞🍒💞

~*✨QT Spook Quik Trip thru Target*✨~

 I got up & got dressed & put makeup on. Put makeup on reallly super well.

 These leggings are my new favorites. Wish my shirt was more fitted, but I luv my outfit today.

 I don't want most G4 things, but thsese are sick. I'd prolly never color dis pretty pastel Luna tho

 eep, new pony playset! daww, that green & purple looks *just* lyk our goosebumps cuppycakes. i just want to look at this every day & remember baking cupcakes with my Lexi bestie

 dis pony doh. if i ever change half my locks from orange it'll be *to* mint green pastel. prolly leave it white alil while tho

 aww, her chubzy cheek. hmm....looks famillz...


~*relative of Sugar Apple fur sure! 88-89 were lyk da best year for ponies. gawd, i luv scented my little ponies. They did it sooo right with first gens. G3 scents sadly fade away even when u leave em boxd!

 Sweets and pastel & favee animals? it's my happy trifecta...srsly a cow & guinea pig!

I wannnnt

later at whole foods

FREE SAMPLES~gluten free cookies. omgaw they gewd

 Yup, we're splitting egg salad. I heart eggs & I'll poison myself if I want, haha.

✨ Feelin Good Times ✨

I opened my lights even tho my room is no where near light ready. Dose candy corn ones are *the* best colors; they look yummZ when they're not even lit. It's so sad seeing all the spooky fade from store shelves. I'm still livin the spooky cute life tho.

hey bestie~found a use for those stars I saved~lol

 Little known fact: cajun seasoning makes all food better. As does Herbamare.

Lexi inspired me. She does shit when she feels like it. Me, I get so concerned with doing it perfect, waiting for a less fuzzle headed day & not wasting materials that crafting & customizing kinda becomes an anxiety ridden chore for me.  Not that Lexi doesn't pop out perf. She certainly does & I do too, but only on my super good days. I didn't feel like this day I'd be able to do a good job; shaky hands, blurry vision, low lighting, nothing to draw on it with, and no pins at hand. Oh well! I did what I felt like doin anyway and I'm proud of myself. I love this crappy tee now even if it is hella far from perfect. My idea is bomb. I know I can do a much better job & next time I will.

Finally got popples in the bath. 

Now I can make more necklaces.

 Lookit me, doin stuff.

Oh, wow~that's Fo Bear~this seriously never happens.

I'm not the only one who loves legging weather.

My chow mai fun was espesh yellow & super yum.

J came over & brought me birthday prezzies. So. much. candy~Yee*!*

I've never seen this pony thing before*!*  I wonder who I got...

He picked me out a Pinkie Pie blind barrel~how pinkin purf*!* She so squishy; like a supah kewt squinky.

I got Pinkie Pie's for my birfday. This epic big one is from Lexi. It's the first pony back in my life & so far so good.

 No, Pinkie Pie. Only play fetch with squinkies..... & Pooh dressed in food stuffs.

Time for cute pocky*!*

We feasted on my giant crispy treat.

I had such a good time with J. I hadn't seen him in like a month cuz I was a sick mess before Halloweek. I totes sold him on Animal Crossing: New Leaf *&* he's moved into my town. When I was demo-ing that furnitures can be changed I noticed the table wasn't the only item I could select from my inventory; I handed over the gold I'd just found and was told if I get 2 more I can have GOLD furniture*!* I had no idea*!!* Glob, I love the new Animal Crossing. Later on I got a headache so we had drinkies. I tried this banana stuff he brought that was crazy yum. As the night wore on we talked about aliens, ate candy, & I introduced him to My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. He likes Rainbow Dash. I tried to keep my singing & pointing out of pony loyal servicing to a minimum. After the first ep I skipped to Parasprites & then the redick badass Canterlot Wedding. I'd forgoten how much ponies and friendship mean to me.

This was srsly the first time I didn't feel headache horrid when we hung out. Maybe my Thurs headache streak is over. I actually got tired after 12 hours & went to bed after J left. At Lexi's I slept insanely good, but since I've been back, even, my sleep is better. I'm still a creature of the night; sleep during the day.

There's still a lot left.